Royal Rumble was poor wasn’t it. But, was it as poor as the 2013 Survivor Series? No. Was it as bad as Wrestlemania 9? No. Did it make you want to rip your eyes out and feed them to a cat? Probably not.
The over reactions and near-suicidal tweets relating to the end of the Royal Rumble not only make a mockery of wrestling fans but of humanity in general. Hiding behind keyboards people are taking personal offence to Roman Reigns’ winning and deciding they ‘want out’. Trending Worldwide is #CancelWWENetwork, a rather self-aggrandising ‘movement’ that will only succeed in helping Raw score a better rating, making a failure of the whole thing.
These days of instant gratification have made people sour and egotistical. Everything must be done for them and if it isn’t they’ll ‘raise hell and leave’. Instead, it is important for people to realise that WWE is a massive picture and a continually evolving company. Like it or not Roman Reigns is going to be a big part of the future and the way to build him is to have him face the best, or in this case the Beast. The Philadelphia crowd reaction spoke for itself but last night presents an opportunity for Reigns to change his character and maybe even turn heel. He’ll also have the advantage of going against Paul Heyman in promos which can only be a positive.
Away from Reigns there were some terrible booking errors in allowing Bryan and Ziggler to have such little impact. Their cameos have left people frustrated but if they now enter feuds that allow them to flourish – Bryan and Rollins, Ziggler and Wyatt would work – then you’ll have some cracking action for ‘Mania and potentially four massive stars. Dean Ambrose seems to be flapping about with little to do so a run with Orton when he returns could be productive in helping him push on. Added into the mix will be Cena/Rusev which will take Rusev to the main event level.
WWE is in a difficult position with a lack of main event level talent. They need to work hard to develop what they have but, given time and the magical Wrestlemania season, they will succeed. So, as Take That said, have a little patience.
On November 17 in Las Vegas, Nevada, Dana White, the president of the Ultimate Fighting Championship, is poised to mate a “huge” announcement (their words not mine). The speculation online is rife; has UFC finally been sanctioned to promote in New York? Is Canada’s favourite son, George St Pierre (sorry Bret), returning? Or, more depressingly for us WWE fans, is Brock Lesnar about to leave us again and re-enter the Octagon?
There have been a few clues pointing at a Brock Lesnar return. Retired heavyweight Shane Carwin and the might-as-well-be-retired Frank Mir have recently called out “The Beast” even though he hasn’t fought in the UFC since 2011. Are these just plays for these formally decent fighters to make headlines? Perhaps something more is happening behind the scenes and they’re looking for one final payday against the biggest draw in UFC pay-per-view history.
Another potential sign that Brock is tempted to jump ship is that in a recent interview, Dana White said he has been in contact with Brock Lesnar and that not only is he welcome back at any time, but he would love to see a fully fit, non-diverticulitis riddled Brock back in the octagon.
As this is a Wrestling website and doesn’t cover Mixed Martial Arts, I thought that we should look at the potential issues that the WWE could face.
First of all, does WWE want the general public knowing that their champion is going to disappear following his huge push? This happened 10 years ago, in 2004, and for months the fans didn’t care about any of his matches, thus leading to a disastrous bout with Bill Goldberg (who was also on his way out) at WrestleMania XX. WWE cannot let this happen again.
Brock and Bill, about to enjoy a ‘goodbye’ kiss.
Secondly, since his return, WWE has pushed Brock to the moon by having him end the Undertaker’s WrestleMania streak, convincingly defeat John Cena for the WWE title, and letting him be a part-time champ, which, up until this time, was unheard of. WWE knows that Brock Lesnar is box-office gold and if his contract ends in January (which is speculated) and he re-signs to the UFC, any plans for him to drop the title and put over someone like Roman Reigns or Daniel Bryan are scuppered. This would effectively mean that the last 18 months of strong booking for Brock would have been wasted, only for him to drop the belt back to John Cena at the Royal Rumble (assuming that Cena is still the number 1 contender and, as speculated, this is when Lesnar is scheduled to next defend his title).
A part of me would like to see Brock back in the UFC. Another theory that’s knocking around is that he might be working for both companies at the same time, but I can’t see that happening. Both Vince McMahon and Dana white have massive egos. They wouldn’t want to share their prized commodity.
The main reason I don’t see that happening is the potential of having a legitimate fighter losing in the UFC but beating everyone in WWE would make WWE look like a far weaker product. Everyone knows that pro wrestling, sorry, Sports Entertainment, is a work, but from the outside how would it look if on one channel, Brock is getting battered by Cain Valesquez and on another channel he is chucking John Cena around like a ragdoll. Vince wouldn’t let that happen.
Not only does Brock Lesnar guarantee high viewing numbers, he adds an air of authenticity and has an aura that is extremely tough to duplicate. His ‘big fight’ style matches with John Cena, Triple H, The Undertaker and CM Punk have been some of the most intense and entertaining bouts in recent years and it would be a huge loss not only to the WWE Universe, but the company as a whole if he were to leave.
Recently we saw the release of The Ultimate Warriror’s career retrospective (read our review here), a collection of matches featuring a man whom we all remember fondly and who sadly passed away all too soon. However, let’s not lie to ourselves, he was bloody awful. His matches stank to high heaven and he was, by all accounts, a bit of a knob. His tragic passing so soon after his re-emergence into the limelight will cement his legendary status, but the fact of the matter is he was a body builder who shook the ropes, favoured clotheslines and was far more successful than his talent ever warranted.
On a completely different note, Dave Bautista has a DVD coming out.
Like the Warrior’s, it’s a collection of duff encounters peppered with occasional highlights in which he is carried by some superior workers and made to look far better than you might expect.
The centerpiece of WWE’s (usually excellent) DVD releases would normally be the documentary; offering exclusive content and insight. Of course the matches are equally important, but a committed fan can normally find them kicking around YouTube (other unofficial sources of wrestling matches are available) therefore the documentary becomes the planet around which the matches and special features orbit.
What we get is 34 minutes of Dave huffing and puffing as he struggles to get in and out of his car, the area and his ring gear. Apart from occasional flashbacks to his foray into MMA and his back surgery, the doc follows The Animal around backstage on the night of his big win at the Royal Rumble 2014. Now, this should be a big selling point, for it was the night that the WWE Universe turned against Dave and Boo-Tista was born. It was the night in which the fans made their voices heard like never before, rejecting the hero they were given and calling for the one they wanted, a certain Mr Daniel Bryan. Had the piece focused on Dave’s reaction to being booed out of the building, this would have made for an interesting watch. Instead, he briefly mentions it, noticing the crowd were ‘hot for Daniel,’ but that’s about it.
There are talking heads in which he discusses how the internet wrestling community got on his back, how it hurt his feeling when they said he didn’t deserve the win, then the odd-faced-fellow claims that we’ve all forgotten about his past, his previous matches and the capital he carried as a performer. What he doesn’t seem to notice is that we DO remember, and that’s WHY we wanted Bryan instead of him. Batista was, at his very peak, average to a staggering degree. Had he returned to face Brock Lesnar or another big star in a mid-to-upper card feud, nobody would have minded. But to walk straight back into the main even at WrestleMania 30 clearly put a lot of people off and he seems blissfully unaware or completely dismissive of any legitimate criticism.
Apart from that, he seems nice enough. Self-critical and humble, but that does not make for a great watch and the whole documentary (all 34 minutes of it) is surprisingly boring.
The matches are what they are; a collection of passable bouts involving clothesline after clothesline after shoulder block. The first one featuring him (as Leviathan) vs a young Brock from their Ohio Valley Wrestling days is a curious piece if completely stagnant. Lots of tag matches featuring Booker T follow which should never have made any compilation, yet his big Mania matches with Thriple H and The Undertaker are notable by their absence. He is occasionally elevated by superior talent, such as his clashes with CM Punk, Shawn Michaels and, yes indeed, John Cena. His hardcore battle with HBK is particularly good, but these are no reasons to fork out on what is a pretty duff collection.
It goes without saying that if you like Batista, you’ll enjoy this. If you don’t like him, of course you’ll avoid this like it was riddled with Jerry Lawler’s finger prints. If however, you’re on the fence about old Dave, believe me, this will only cement the notion that he is not worth your time. Like the Ultimate Warrior’s DVD, this archive accentuates how poor The Animal is. If you like him as a person and want to support him, go and see Guardians of the Galaxy, because that looks entertaining. This isn’t. Two thumbs down. Then a powerbomb.
Sunday evening the Jive Soul Bros sat down to sample the majesty and pageantry of WrestleMania XXX (that means 30, not hardcore super-sex, you filthy buggers). What follows is a factual account of how it all went down.
8.20pm
The Jive Soul Bros get together. Beer in the fridge, crisps on the table in anticipation for the big show.
8.27pm
Crisps eaten.
8:30pm
As a pre-WrestleMania treat we log into the WWE Network a for the previous evening’s Hall Of Fame ceremony.
Watching the Hall Of Fame is always a risky business, as you are committing a lot of time to people blowing their own trumpets (oo-er). This year’s ceremony is no different, as Ultimate Warrior and, disappointingly, Lita waffle on about themselves for bloody ages. On the flip-side ,Paul Bearer’s sons said about four words and Carlos Colon showed off his wonderfully bladed forehead (which, much like Dusty Rhodes’ head, has started to look like a saggy old bollock).
It’s left for two residents of DDP’s ‘Accountability Crib’, Scott Hall (inducted as Razor Ramon) and Jake Roberts, to class the joint up. Roberts’ speech is particularly heartfelt after a magnificent introduction from Diamond Dallas Page. He even manages to go ten minutes without mentioning DDP Yoga.
The less said about Mr. T and his incessant mother chat the better. He really does love his mum, though.
10:20pm
Bit bored of the Hall Of Fame we head to the kitchen jus as Kane interrupts Mr. T, which was both mean and awkward. One of the JSB crew has cooked a joint of ham, which disappears quicker than a Dolph Ziggler push.
10.45pm
Someone checks Twitter and announces Cesaro’s gone babyface on the pre-show. We’re now even more annoyed the tag team four-way was pulled from the main card.
11:50pm
Ten minutes away from ‘Mania and the excitement has built to such a fever we start cracking out our favourite wrestling shirts, with Austin, Sheamus, and a couple of WrestleMania 25 jerseys on show. We settle down to watch ten minutes of the pay-per-view screenshot.
11:52pm
Tired of the screenshot we pop off to the fridge for a beer and eat a few nachos. They had guacamole, salsa, sour cream, cheese and a two-meat chilli on them. If you’re interested.
12:00pm or is it am?
Shenanigans kick off in the most beautiful way as Hulk ‘did I mention the WWE Network yet’ Hogan makes his way to the ring and immediately knobs up by calling the Superdome the Silverdome. Michael Cole picks up on it and asks if Hogan thinks he’s still at Wrestlemania III. He isn’t – the crowd were far more into him back then.
As Hogan waffles on there’s a lovely smash of glass and “It’s Austin, it’s Austin, it’s Austin!!!!” The Rattlesnake makes his way to the ring to the kind of ovation usually reserved for Zack Ryder and immediately begins making fun of Hogan for his Silverdome mistake. Austin whips the crowd into a frenzy and just when they can’t take anymore The Rock’s music hits and 75,167 collectively ruin themselves and ask “Can it get any better?” And it bloody well does, as a clearly emotional Rock continues the take the piss out of Hogan by mentioning the Silverdome cock-up again.
The segment ends with a beery toast and we’re about done before it’s even started.
12:20am
Bryan vs. HHH 6-7 video package and build-up. Thunderous ovation for Bryan. For some reason, Triple H is dressed as the ghetto-fabulous Skeletor from the Masters Of The Universe movie.
12.45am
One of the Jive Soul Bros has already had too much beer, and has started claiming “Nothing’s been the same since they brought in a fifth pay-per-view.”
1:01am
Despite genuine concern that Triple H’s ego is perfectly of walking out of ‘Mania as champ, he does the right thing and puts Bryan over in a phenomenal moment. We’ve already had the match of the night, but it’s far from over – we’re starting to get the idea this is going to be a brilliant WrestleMania.
1.08am
Time for The Shield Vs Kane and the New Age Outlaws. We suspect the previous segments have overrun, because they tear through this so quickly it’s like they have to rush off somewhere afterwards (the buffet cart presumably, from the look Mr Ass’s, erm ass).
1.12am
They wheel out the old legends for the annual backstage skit. We’re especially pleased to see an appearance from Danny Davis, though we’re probably one of ten or so people who actually remembered him.
1.15am
The battle royal entrants are in the ring. No one in the room cares, because, let’s be honest, battle royals usually suck giant Andre balls. We are pleased no see Cesaro’s made his way into the match, however.
1.23am
We’re down the the final six men and this is actually getting pretty damn good. Cesaro looks awesome and there are plenty of big spots (including Kofi’s most dangerous but brilliant escape from elimination yet).
1.28am
Cesaro lifts Big Show up for what feels like bloody ages and dumps him outside. It’s one of this ‘Mania’s greatest moments, though we’re disappointed he didn’t swing Show round 20 times then launch him out of the ring that way. Cesaro and Show shakes hands. It’s enough to make a grown man cry. Especially if that man is drunk and emotional because, “Nothing’s been the same since referees stopped wearing blue shirts with bow-ties.”
1.35am
Bray Wyatt makes his entrance. Arguably, it’s the best live ‘Mania intro yet. But then I say that every time a band turns up and I realise that, mercifully, it’s not Kid fucking Rock.
1.51am
Wyatt does that Exorcist spider-walk thing as Cena goes for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. It’s the high point of what is overall a very decent encounter, even if the finish was slightly rushed. Musn’t grumble though, as Wyatt looked a million dollars, spurred on, we imagine, by the bloke in the crowd dressed as IRS.
2.28am
Brock Lesnar Vs Undertaker kicks-off. Our attention begins to wane slightly. Someone is saying, “Thing is, I know it will be solid, but we already know the outcome, Lesnar’s lost to almost everybody in the last two years, and I can imagine exactly how the match will play out. It’s hardly going to make history.”
2.53am
We almost miss the count of three because we’re all checking Twitter. The room is completely stunned, which we demonstrate my sitting forward and holding our heads in overly-dramatic fashion.
2.54am
A man does a face.
2.56am
Still in shock, someone says, “I can’t believe they ended the streak on such a piss-poor match, and wasted it on a part-timer with a history of walking away from the company.” Someone else replies, “Oh, shut up you old fart. It was clearly time… ‘Taker has started to look like a middle-aged, Guardian reading lesbian.” The debate ends with the words, “Nothing’s been the same since he stopped wearing grey stirrups, anyway.” This is suddenly on track to being the biggest and most significant WrestleMania for years.
3.04am
The Divas Invitational gets going, which prompts everyone to take a toilet break.
3.10am
We all return from the toilet to discover AJ has turned this nonsense into the strongest Divas match at WrestleMania since Trish Stratus hung up her boots. Which isn’t saying much, mind you.
3.12am
Backstage skit involving the main event players from the first ever ‘Manis – Hogan, Piper, Orndorf and Mr T. Everyone’s so distracted by the size of Orndorf’s moustache to notice how embarrassingly bad this is.
3.20am
It’s time for the main event. Now, more than ever, we’re convinced Bryan will win it. We’re in high spirits, and even comments like “Nothing’s been the same since they stopped having red, white and blue ropes” can’t sully the atmosphere.
3.35am
Triple H and Steph make their return to the action. Christ, they’re good heels when they’re not just waffling endless bollocks and boring everyone to death. They bring out crooked ref Scott Armstrong, though someone has to explain the significance as it’s been bloody months since the rubbish ‘fast count’ angle and most of us have forgotten.
3.36am
Triple H cops a rubber sledgehammer to the mush. We comment on how amazing it is to see him properly get foiled after months of never booking his comeuppance. Then someone says “He’ll probably end up winning the title on Raw”, which unfortunately sounds quite realistic.
3.40am
Bryan takes a brutal-looking neckbreaker/RKO/Batista Bomb to the Spanish announce table. The poor buggers. We were sure when the French announcers turned up it meant the Spanish would get a night off.
3.44am
Bryan gets off the stretcher. I nearly shit myself with joy, but manage to keep a lid on it.
3.47am
Batista takes an RKO and kicks out as close to three as possible. Masterful work from the Animal and for a second, we believe that WWE will screw Bryan – and all of us – after all. On the contrary, it’s the beginning of a blistering finishing sequence.
3.50am
Batista taps to the Yes Lock and it’s over. Celebrations are being had all round.
3.52am
To cap off what has been one of the worst directed PPVs in memory (someone in the production suite is ripe for one of Vinnie Mac’s customary firings), they can’t find a clear iconic shot of Bryan with the belts, because there are either signs in the way, or because someone’s bought too much confetti.
4.05am
It’s been off-air for a few minutes and we’re still weighing it up. It’s tough to be objective this soon after the event, but we’re rating it as one of the top ‘Manias ever, just below X-Seven – it had drama, surprises, quality action and a proper story. It’s entirely possible we’ve been caught in the moment – not to mention a crate of beer and enough crisps to feed a small family for a week – but either way, WrestleMania XXX is a reminder that WWE occasionally gives us reason to do more than bitch and moan about it on the internet.
Booking matches for The Undertaker has proved difficult in recent years. Since ‘Taker retired Shawn Michaels he has had two pleasant matches with Triple H and a doozy with CM Punk. But the outcomes have always been inevitable, and tonight is sadly no different.
Facing off against Brock Lesnar the match is guaranteed to be decent but trying to make the crowd at the Superdome, and the TV audience, believe the streak is in danger will be almost impossible.
With this in mind it makes sense for ‘Taker to win via submission after a physically brutal encounter.
But what then?
Booking for these two part-timers will be very difficult. The Undertaker, we imagine, will move away from our TV screens for a few months and reappear when needed.
Lesnar is of more interest. In the last year he has been made to look like a monster who physically dominates opponents, but, following tonight, he will be a strong, athletic bloke who has been beaten by a 49-year old deadman. Like ‘Taker we anticipate Lesnar walking away for a bit with a possible return at Summerslam.
Monday night saw the ‘go home’ Raw before WrestleMania this Sunday. As should be the case, each of the upcoming bouts were promoted and had their chance at one final push to drum up some interest and, more importantly, buys.
As the crowd took their seats and viewers turned on their TVs for the start of Raw, there was a moderate surprise as the Undertaker’s music hit and the deadman made his way to the ring. Following a bog-standard and error-filled promo (‘Taker also tripped up the steps on his way to the ring), Brock Lesnar’s music hit and he and Paul Heyman appeared on the stage. Feigning to walk away, Lesnar instead headed tentatively to the ring, threatening to get in many times before Heyman distracted the Deadman and Lesnar moved in and, after a brief but physical exchange, hit the F5.
Prior to this final promo we were having trouble getting enthused for the match, unsurprising given the inevitable result. But, following this exchange, which was helped by an electric Washington crowd, we can’t wait to see two of the most physically dominant performers in WWE history square-off.
Following this great start, the booking team took advantage of a hot crowd and introduced Intercontinental Champion Big E, for his match with the underused and under appreciated Alberto Del Rio. While the crowd failed to explode as Big E would have wanted, they were turned around by a bout that had near falls, submission attempts, and a brutal-looking finish, which consisted of a double stomp off the top rope followed by a kick to the head of Big E.
Sad to see Del Rio go over the IC Champ, but ADR made Big E look a million dollars and that can’t be a bad thing.
Straight after the finish the Wyatts hit a promo from the back.
To say that Wyatt is the most watchable and creepy element in WWE at the moment is an understatement. True to form he delivered in a big way, making the crowd and audience at home believe that he truly hates John Cena with all his might, and that he’ll do anything to end him at WrestleMania and kill his legacy. Fantastic stuff.
From the sublime to the ridiculous, as we were ‘treated’ to a look at Summer Rae slapping Natalya on Total Divas. This came after Natalya made a very good point about the Divas division and led to a match between the two. Who says the slowbuild is dead, hey?!
Summer Rae won and no-one cared. One day they’ll turn the Divas around, but today isn’t that day.
Continuing the pattern of magnificent to inconsequential, the Authority made their way to the ring for a denouncement of the ‘Yes’ movement.
Now, we are people who had grown tired of Mr and Mrs Triple H’s antics in recent months but they’ve drawn us in wonderfully in the last few weeks. Continuing this roll they set up the main event of ‘Mania brilliantly by stating how Triple H has dominated everyone in WWE and is permanent, whereas Daniel Bryan is temporary. This is why he’ll leave WrestleMania as WWE Heavyweight Champion.
As they continue to run down the champ, Orton, and other challenger, Batista, the latter makes his way to the ring. Now, many of you will have rolled your eyes at The Animal’s antics in recent weeks, but we’ve bloody loved it. He’s gone from trying to be nice to just being himself – an egotist who hates the crowd – and it’s all come up rosy. Same goes for Orton who has moved into the kiss ass role perfectly and this continued on Raw.
In all, this exchange was as electrifying as anything on the show and has whetted our appetite for the main event, whoever may compete.
Having been bumped from the main card on ‘Mania, the four teams involved in the Fatal Four Way for the tag titles – Rybaxel, Los Matadores, The Real Americans and champions The Usos – were involved in an eight-man tag match with the heels joining forces to take on the faces.
As you’d expect, the action was fast and hard-hitting from everyone, well, except Rybaxel who were effectively buried. That’ll teach Ryback for bullying all those backstage workers a few months ago, the scoundrel.
We skipped the Sandow & Fandango Vs. The Brotherhood match but are told it was a bit of a squash. Poor Damien, poor Fandango.
The squash probably wasn’t up to much, but neither was The Shield’s final promo before ‘Mania. In fact, it was downright dull and included lots of talk about fists. I didn’t think they were into that kind of justice, but hey, whatever floats your boat.
Bray Wyatt had his own little squash against R – I challenged for the title once – Truth. Lasting all of four minutes it showcased Wyatt’s main moves and ended in a lovely little pose. Oh, hang on, who’s this behind in the goat mask? It’s only John Cena. Cue an enormous pop, a great intense look from Cena, and a lovely AA escape from Wyatt. Finally, we ruin ourselves in anticipation of their match on Sunday.
Roman Reigns Vs. Kane ended in a no finish as the New Age Outlaws and Rollins and Ambrose came down to protect their respective partners. All well and good but the Outlaws look bloody old and we’re not sure they can put on a ‘Mania worthy match, even with The Shield.
Oh, sorry, we forgot about a match between AJ “I’m carrying all of these women on my back” Lee and Naomi. All the other participants in the Vickie Guerrero Invitational surrounded the ring and got involved in the finale. It was all bit rubbish though.
Piper’s Pit was up next and was a failed attempt to hype the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal. Basically, The Miz, Sheamus, Titus O’Neil and Devious Dolph came down to say “I’m going to win”, before a load of the other participants came to the ring before being cleared out by the Big Show. Piper then jumped in and raised Big Show’s hand, it is possible he thought this was the actual Battle Royal though.
For the big finish Orton and Batista faced off in a No DQ match with Triple H and Mrs. H on commentary. All was going OK for the pair until Daniel Bryan came from the crowd and attacked Triple H to a magnificent pop. Following a bit of four-way action (oo-er) Bryan was left standing tall in the ring ‘Yes’-ing the hell out of everyone. All the while Triple H sold the little beatdown like he’d been hit by a truck. Blimey we’re excited for Sunday!
We’ll have much more looking forward to Wrestlemania XXX this week so keep it Jive Soul Bros.
Today is the first day in April and, with the thirtieth WrestleMania less than a week away, let us look at something extra special. While Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock had, what some consider, the ‘greatest’ rivalry in WrestleMania history, The Rattlesnake was lucky enough to be a part of, without question, the finest wrestling match of all time; Brock Lesnar vs Goldberg at WrestleMania 20 (or if you’re Roman, XX).
You might not even notice that Austin was the referee because the crowd have so little interest in him. It’s not surprising as the cheers are deafening for both Brock and Bill, each man clearly delighted with the waves of love pouring from the crowd. Chants of “We Love Lesnar!” and “Goldberg Consistently Makes For Compelling Narratives!” ring out across Madison Square Garden and the competitors don’t disappoint as the standard of wrestling was beyond reproach. Kurt Angle and Eddie Guerrero’s WWE Championship Match paled in comparison with the technical prowess on display here. No doubt influenced by the work of William Regal and Jushin Thunder Liger, this bout is used as a training manual for any young grapplers who want to know what true wrestling is.
We shan’t spoil the ending, but the display of sportsmanship after the final bell brings a tear to the eye. In a moment reminiscent of WrestleMania 6 (or VI if you’re a Spartan), all three men embrace and raise each other’s arms to a standing ovation. Cries of ‘Re-match! Re-Match!’ from the ecstatic crowd would mean we would surely see more of this and luckily, we have, as they would fight at every pay-per-view since, each time getting better and better. Perhaps the greatest legacy left by this match can be summed up in one word: Ryback.
Ever since 1993, the main thrust of the Royal Rumble was to set up the main event for WrestleMania by having the winner go on to face the champion. It hadn’t always worked out like that, particularly since WWE introduced TWO top tier champions and often the winner of The Rumble could end up on the middle of the card at Mania or worse, OPENING THE SHOW (See Rule 3). This did Alberto Del Rio, Sheamus and the fans no favours. No favours at all.
However, the great thing about the Royal Rumble is that, once in a while, it’ll ignite a rivalry that will go on to WrestleMania and often be far more exciting than the the main event. In 1989 Big John Studd was left standing tall. Did it make him a star? Did he make history at the Granddaddy Of Them All? Believe me, folks. Bull Buchanan has made more of an impact than Big John Ruddy Studd. No sir. History remembers that match because The Mega Powers exploded. Hogan, intentionally or otherwise, chucked out his mate the ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage, who also happened to hold the WWF Championship and be managed by Miss Elizabeth, two things Hogan no doubt wanted to get his grubby orange hands on. At least that’s what Macho thought. So when he got back in the ring and was all up in Hogan’s grill, the crowd went absolutely bloody barmy. Vince followed the smell of money and the two headlined WrestleMania in one of the best matches of Hogan’s career. But then Macho could have a great match with a traffic cone. Maybe even Bull Buchanan. Or Big John Studd. Maybe not Big John Studd.
The following year the same thing happened; Hogan had a mid-Rumble showdown with a fellow top face, this time it was the soon to return Ulllllllllltimate Warrior. In one of the great moments in WWE history, the two titans eliminated every other rassler in the ring and turned, slowly turned to realise who they were left with. The crowd pops like you wouldn’t believe as they stare each other down, psych each other up and finally, FINALLY clash. It’s short but my god it’s incredible. Sure enough they would go on the clash again, this time in the greatest match of both their lives. Let us never speak of their rematch in WCW.
HBK had two great Mania matches set up in the Rumble. First in 2003, his feud with Chris Jericho escalated with Y2J and his buddy Christian pulling the old switcheroo and having Michaels dumped in one of the most shocking eliminations ever which led to an absolute classic in March. Better yet was his first ever confrontation with Olympic Gold medallist Kurt Angle. In the 2005 Rumble, Kurt was on a rampage but was quickly dumped by the Heart Break Kid. Angle rushed back in, chucked Shawn and beat him to a heart shaped pulp. I remember bouncing with joy at the prospect of a Kurt/HBK match at ‘Mania and sure enough they embarked on an extraordinary programme (involving Marty Jannety and Sensational Sherri no less!) leading to, you guessed it, one of the greatest matches of their respective careers.
Then we have Brock’s run-in against Goldberg in 2004. They first went nose-to-nose at the preceding Survivor Series and again backstage at the Rumble. Why? Because it was a dream match and we were being teased like a gooden. But would anything come of it? You betcha. When Goldy-berg entered the match at number 30 he predictably picked apart the competition. Bill never looked better then when his moments were short and impactful. After ploughing through the competitors like a hot knife through butter or Randy Orton through sexual harassment claims, Brock rocked up to a ma-hoo-sive pop and F5’d Goldberg to the delight of thousands in the crowd. Goldberg staggered up, eyes locked with Brock, he growled ‘You’re NEXT you son of a bitch!’ Then Kurt Angle eliminates him for the good of mankind. I was pumped for their inevitable WrestleMania match. You were pumped. We all were pumped. Did it live up to the hype? Remember that 1998 Hogan/Warrior rematch I mentioned earlier? Watch that. Watch that over the Brock/Goldberg match. Then have a nice relaxing cry.
With the 2014 Royal Rumble only days away, who knows what new feuds will ignite going into WrestleMania XXX (that means 30, it’s not a wrestling porno). With an event that prestigious, they ought to be something special. The Wyatt’s vs The Shield? Punk vs Bryan? Let’s see if they do what’s best for business.
Jive Soul Bros Wrestling 